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farmmilkmama Posted - Aug 07 2011 : 7:12:25 PM
I just got back from a family picnic at the beach/park area. I was looking forward to fabulous adult conversation while my children hung out nearby and played with all their cousins. Somehow I got roped into being the "responsible one" who kept an eye on all the kids at not just the park, but the beach as well!. My kids wanted to swim so the rest of the kids followed me down to the beach. (None of the other parents came though. Strange, eh????) It wouldn't have been that big of a deal if all the kids would have a been a little older and knew how to swim, but my sister just let her 2 and 4 year old run, totally unsupervised, all over the beach. I kept saying "you HAVE to watch your kids! They are too little to be down here without direct supervision. You have to keep an eye on them!" It's one thing to keep any eye out for kids who are older, but they needed like constant supervision. Neither of them could swim and both of them spent all their time stealing toys from other families at the beach. So I went from trying to pull her kids away from other people's stuff, trying to keep them out of the water, trying to check on where my own kids were (who were told to stay in a certain area and DID)and didn't get to talk to anyone at the picnic! It was so ridiculous. After a couple hours I got tired of telling her and her husband "Seriously, you need to watch your kids." They would just walk away and go to the park (without their kids!) or go up and grab something to eat from the picnic area (without their kids!!)and be gone for 15-20 minutes at time. I kept taking her kids by the hand and dragging them back to my sister and saying "Your son was..." or "Your daughter was...." and somehow they'd always end up back by us. So after two hours we decided to leave because my husband and I figured we didn't go to the family reunion picnic to be the daycare service. I was REALLY mad. It makes me angry that people will just a) not watch their kids, especially somewhere like a beach and b) that parents (especially in my family) know I won't just leave a kid unattended and so they TOTALLY take advantage of that. GRRRR!!!!

--* FarmMilkMama *--

Farmgirl Sister #1086

Be yourself.
Everyone else is already taken.
-Oscar Wilde

www.farmfoodmama.blogspot.com

www.thehmmmschoolingmom.blogspot.com
8   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
natesgirl Posted - Aug 09 2011 : 10:24:37 AM
My Hubby and I have a 'policy' for family get togethers. If I get the whole mess of kids dumped on me(usually this amounts to 20-30 kids ages 2-16) he goes to the parents with the kids in hand and tells them I'm not feelin great because I haven't been sleepin well lately. Which is nearly always true when there is a get together comin up. I worry about it and how out of control the house will become with all the extra preparations and cookin.

He will send the kids back to the parents twice, then we leave if it doesn't change.

We take our food with us and we go to a park. The kids play, we rest and talk, and I always make an entree, a side, a salad, and a dessert. That way our plan works great!

The last time, we had 3 other families join us who were also dumped on in the same way. They said they saw us leavin and learned of our plan from my mom, so they thought it would be nice to have a quiet afternoon and some company to talk to! We really had a nice time and we now have a few families who will be joinin us for each get together escape!

Just a thought for next time it happens to you!

Farmgirl Sister #1438

God - Gardening - Family - Is anything else important?
FarmDream Posted - Aug 08 2011 : 8:28:24 PM
I'm so sorry the picnic turned out so bad for you. I have also left a picnic once when another person wasn't watching their little rotten monster and was trying to get my DD to walk into traffic. And no, it wasn't my imagination. The other "child" has always been a creep. I got tired of running interference on this situation with no help from the other parent. I left after an hour. The good news is that I have never been to any other gathering that was bad. Hopefully this was your one really bad event and all your future ones will be happy.

~FarmDream is Farmgirl Sister #3069

Live Today, Cherish Yesterday, Dream Tomorrow

http://naturaljulie.etsy.com
http://julie-rants.blogspot.com
woolgirl Posted - Aug 08 2011 : 09:30:44 AM
I have the exact same problem with my neighbors. I have posted about it before, but my next door neighbors let their little girl who is only 4 outside all the time while the mom and dad stay inside with the door closed. They even let her go to the park, which is quite a ways away. I feel guilty if I run inside to grab a quick drink if Rosemary is outside! But then they expect me to watch her! What the heck! There has only been one time where they actually asked me to keep an eye on her, which I naturally said was fine, and the dad's response was "I have to keep an eye on my other child too, you know." Their baby is almost 1! Bring her outside too! And why is it my fault they have two children?

Different parenting styles I guess. Sorry the day turned out so lousy.

Liz
Farmgirl #1947
www.militaryfarmgirl.blogspot.com
farmmilkmama Posted - Aug 08 2011 : 06:00:44 AM
Thanks, gals. This is just par for the course for my sister. In a considerate family, they would have asked or taken turns like you suggested, Alee.

I guess what really made me mad is I found out last night (afterwards) that everyone was talking about what a great picnic it was because it was the first time the adults actually had a chance to visit with other adults without having to watch their kids every second. I blew up at my mom and said "The only reason everyone else who had kids got to visit is because all their kids were at the beach with ME!" She said "Well didn't you get to visit with anyone?" I just laughed and told her I figured it was more important that the little kids didn't drown. I don't understand why the other adults couldn't have sat on the beach so everyone could have watched kids instead of dropping the kids at the beach and then heading up the hill so they could visit and not be bothered.

Gosh, its so hard to be an actual parent, isn't it?

Thanks for letting me vent, gals!

--* FarmMilkMama *--

Farmgirl Sister #1086

Be yourself.
Everyone else is already taken.
-Oscar Wilde

www.farmfoodmama.blogspot.com

www.thehmmmschoolingmom.blogspot.com
Alee Posted - Aug 08 2011 : 05:52:14 AM
That is such a frustrating thing to have happen! At least they could have the courtesy of asking first! My husband and I had a barbeque with some friends at a park that has great play equipment for the kids. Both Nora and Preston are about the same age and of course all they wanted to do was go play. So we took it in turns to have one adult accompany the two kids for about half an hour a piece. That way we all watched the kids, but we also all got to chat with one another. It worked out well, but I can't imagine just letting my kids run around without me around water- no matter who they are with! That makes me break out in a cold sweat just thinking about it! I am so sorry that your family members were so inconsiderate! *hugs*

Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
texdane Posted - Aug 08 2011 : 04:39:44 AM
Amy,
How awful! I've been roped into watching other people's kids before like that (not relatives, though), and it always amazes me how parents can do that. Sorry to hear you had such a time. On a happier note, there's a letter on it's way to you!!

Big hugs,

Nicole

Farmgirl Sister #1155
KNITTER, JAM-MAKER AND MOM EXTRAORDINAIRE
Chapter Leader, Connecticut Simpler Life Sisters

Suburban Farmgirl Blogger
http://sfgblog.maryjanesfarm.org/
knittinchick Posted - Aug 07 2011 : 8:33:00 PM
Amy, that's terrible! I'm sorry you were taken advantage of and didn't get to enjoy the picnic:( I agree that it not should fall on one person to watch all the kids at once, especially at a family event.
God's and Farmgirl's Blessings,
Megan

At heart, I am both a sassy city girl and a down-home country gal.

The dictionary is the only place where success comes before work.
smiley Posted - Aug 07 2011 : 8:09:17 PM
Amy its good for the kids that you were there. No telling what might have happened to them. But I wonder when you left and she knew she no longer had free daycare how long she stayed or if someone else took over the babysitting role

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