| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| mommom |
Posted - Apr 11 2008 : 3:17:25 PM
I told you all before how my son was entering rehab for a period of no less than 45 days. He's coming home on April 15th after a ten day stay. I don't know about this. I feel if the life is being sucked out of my lungs. He called collect last night for the first time and said he was in detox for five days and hasn't been on any kind of drug since and is doing fine. He also said that two of his drug dealers are also at this facility and the counselors don't think this is the best place for him to be. We had to hurry up and call a counselor from here that he can see as soon as he gets home. He says he feels fine. Did I already say that? How can someone who is on drugs so heavily and can barely speak coherently or walk without sliding his feet two weeks ago be "fine?" I mean, I know I pray for miracles and what if this truly is one and I'm a doubting Thomas? I just don't think I can go through this again. It was so bad around here that I had a fleeting thought of not wanting to live. He says he has found a couple of hobbies that he really enjoys doing and wants to continue doing them when he gets home. Great. We've deleted all the "bad" numbers out of his cellphone and we've given him a whole new bedroom look. Start fresh. Again. And again. I am truly not a negative person but I really just feel like I could jump out of my skin tonight. I'm sorry for spouting off like this but I really am in a tizzy. Me. The one who prays for everyone and everything has just about lost it. I can't cry. I can't scream. I've lost my voice. Doc says that's nerves. Just keep praying that Jamie makes it this time. Please. Thanks for listening. Susan |
| 9 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| emsmommy5 |
Posted - Apr 15 2008 : 4:55:40 PM
I will still keep you in my prayers as you take this one day at a time!
Angie
Every path has its puddle. We have a choice - Turn around, walk around, or jump in and have fun! |
| mommom |
Posted - Apr 15 2008 : 4:12:01 PM
My dd and dh went to get him this morning and he was all packed and ready to come home at 8am. He was tested for drugs of any kind at 7am and was given a clean bill of health. He had to write down what he wanted to do with his life (goals) and he also had to write an indepth letter to the one he loves the most and has hurt the most (me). I haven't gotten it yet because he wants me to read it with just him. Drugs were rampid at this facility. Scarey. We left him with absolutely not a dime for this very reason. Two of his drug dealers were there and he was not allowed contact with them. He was in one meeting or another during the course of the days. When he got there his counselor asked him if he had ever saved anyones life before and he said no, but that his mom had saved his life twice. The counselor told him that this time around he was saving his own life. He seems happy and eager to get back to his job come Monday. I agree that I can love him but I still doon't trust. He wanted to borrow the car this afternoon to go get a movie and I must've freaked out because he said, I promise I'll be right back! And he smiled. And, he did come right back. We're just going to take it one day and step at a time. He's going to a coffee gathering at our chuch Friday night with my girls and he's going to attend church with us on Saturday evening. He has thanked me several times for fixing his bedroom up with all new things and getting rid of everything that he had set on fire. I have the curtains all cut out and pinned but I haven't had time to sew them yet. I want to thank each and every one of you for all the support and prayers you've sent our way. You have all kept me afloat and have put hope and yes caution in my heart. Brody was here when his Uncle Jabby got home today and let me tell you it was a sight to see. They held onto each other for dear life and ended up taking a nap together. Blessings and hugs to you all. Susan
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| corporatefarmgirl |
Posted - Apr 13 2008 : 11:30:20 AM
Hi Susan,
I just saw your update. I have been out of the loop due to the flu.
First you and your son are in my prayers and thoughts.
Ten days is a very short time. We went through this a few times so I know that the ten days is usally based on what insurance will cover.
A few things that we found to help.
1. NA meetings NIGHTLY - this may seem like a lot but realize your son had daily counceling. The NA meetings help him establish a support team. He should do the nightly meetings for 90 days
2. Find a support group for parents of addicts. They have people there that have been through this. The support and information helps.
3.Hold him accountable regarding meetings
4. He must be accountable as to where he spends his time. My son was also 28 when he finally got clean. His drug counselor explained to him that he has to regain all trust and yes he owes his family explanations
5. Have him write out a game plan. What will he do when he gets the urge to use, what changes is he going to put in place in his life, etc. Have him give you a copy of the plan too.
6. Love but don't trust. I know this sounds hard but he has to do something to earn the trust. When you trust blindly drug addicts will find it easier to slip into old habits
7. Release it to God, for your own sanity. We went through a few different stints in Rehab, meth clinics, outpatient counseling, ect.. I had to let it go and accept the fact that NO ONE but my son could make him stop. I knew that in the bottom of my heart our family had done everything humanly possible. This is a hard one and maybe one of the toughest things I have ever done.
I pray for healing both physical and emotional for everyone involved. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}
Tamara
small farms give big benefits |
| 4forMe |
Posted - Apr 13 2008 : 10:59:20 AM
Susan, I have no advice, but I wanted to say that I am thinking of you and your family.
Sewing, knitting, gardening mom of 4. |
| levisgrammy |
Posted - Apr 12 2008 : 6:05:09 PM
Susan,
Thinking of you and praying for you.
Hugs,
Denise
farmgirl sister #43
Kind hearts are gardens
Kind thoughts are roots
Kind words are blossoms
Kind deeds are Fruits
www.torismimi.blogspot.com
www.torisgram.etsy.com |
| Nancy Gartenman |
Posted - Apr 12 2008 : 5:43:53 PM
Susan,
Glad to see you are feeling more positive today. I hope for the whole family that all goes well.
NANCY JO
www.Nancy-Jo.blogspot.com |
| mommom |
Posted - Apr 12 2008 : 5:37:44 PM
His counselor called me and said he is doing very well. He feels he doesn't want this lifestyle anymore and is willing to work real hard to kick it for good. Jamie was just 28 on Tuesday. We have called a counselor here and will be taking him there when we bring him home on Tuesday. He truly sounds wonderful on the phone but he can be a good actor when he needs to be. It does seem so soon to me to be okay. I'm sorry I've laid this problem on all of you. I was watching a program last night on tv and the woman said, "When you face your fears you become fearless." Maybe this has truly been a turning point for my boy. We'll be fine. I have to believe that. Susan |
| Nance in France |
Posted - Apr 11 2008 : 4:16:07 PM
Susan, thinking about you and praying for you, as I do for all my farmgal pals. You probably feel numb, cannot cry, etc. because your subconscious is making you shut down a bit (and certainly temporarily) for self preservation. I think that our bodies "let us know" we are not in control of some circumstances and that we need to step back and regroup. Hang in there; we are here for you. Hugs, Nance |
| Nancy Gartenman |
Posted - Apr 11 2008 : 3:59:18 PM
Susan,
It does seem soon doesn't it? Is there another facility that the counselors would recomend? What do the counselors think about him coming home so soon? Maybe two weeks is enough if this is what Jamie really wants. When he gets home will he still be seeing a counselor? How old is Jamie? I'll be thinking of you.
NANCY JO
www.Nancy-Jo.blogspot.com |
