| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| prariehawk |
Posted - Feb 06 2011 : 8:24:29 PM
About two months ago, I lost a friend. Not only was she a friend and an inspiration, she was very involved in the community as a volunteer. She was a mother and grandmother who sometimes hosted tea parties for her grandkids in the front yard. She was a good cook and loved to host, even if it was only for one person, such as the times she had me over for a particularly scrumptious dessert she'd made. she was very supportive of the area CSA's and even provided housing in her home for some of the apprentice farmers who worked on them. She got me involved in prairie restoration and led the monthly full-moon hikes on a nature preserve. She died at the hands of an intruder who broke into her home and killed her, stealing her TV and car. He's now in jail awaiting trial.
I've been struggling to make some sort of sense out of it but some things just never make sense. I feel sad at losing her but also angry--angry that this could happen in my community, angry that the man who killed her was a homeless person that she had helped in the past, angry that there was nothing I could have done to prevent it.
I haven't shared my feelings with many till now,just want the world to remember her and the good things she did. I plan to continue with the volunteer work at the prairie and help keep alive her love of the outdoors. I guess what I'm saying is she was a Farmgirl in every way and I miss her. as will many others who knew her. she always made brownies to share after the full-moon hikes, so now whenever I eat a brownie, I think of her. sorry if this seems sad, I don't mean for it to be, I know she would have wanted everyone to go on enjoying life. I just thought she deserved a tribute. Please be sure to treasure the people in your life who have been an inspiration.
Cindy
"Vast floods can't quench love, no matter what love did/ Rivers can't drown love, no matter where love's hid"--Sinead Connor
"In many ways, you don't just live in the country, it lives inside you"--Ellen Eilers
Visit my blog at http://www.farmerinthebelle.blogspot.com/ |
| 13 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| texdane |
Posted - Feb 10 2011 : 6:50:58 PM
Cindy,
To echo what was said, that was a beautiful tribute. I am so sorry to hear that you lost such a great friend in such a way.
Farmgirl Hugs,
Nicole
Farmgirl Sister #1155
KNITTER, JAM-MAKER AND MOM EXTRAORDINAIRE
http://sfgblog.maryjanesfarm.org/ |
| ceejay48 |
Posted - Feb 09 2011 : 09:16:12 AM
Cindy,
I, too, have nothing to say that has not been said. But I can say that I will be praying for you as you continue to deal with this loss. I will pray for justice, and for the man who took her life.
PRAYING!!
CJ
..from the barefoot farmgirl in SW Colorado...sister chick #665
From my Heart - www.fromacelticheart.blogspot.com
From my Hands - www.cjscreations-ceejay.blogspot.com
From my Hubby - www.aspenforge.blogspot.com |
| FebruaryViolet |
Posted - Feb 09 2011 : 07:50:59 AM
I'm so sorry, Cindy, I just read this. It's tough to see the light in this situation--I know I'd struggle for a long while. Just know that it's alright to be angry, but your friend would probably never want your anger to blind you. Sounds like she was one amazing woman, who still lives within your heart and your mind. Keep her there as you walk through this trying world. Do what she would have done, and in that way, her words and deeds will continue to live on.
We can never know "why" this happened, other than poverty, ignorance, desperation--these times are rife with all of this--but we can be rest assured that there is consequence for actions, and that she has been given a grand chair at the table.
So sorry for your, and your community's loss.
Musings from our family in the Bluegrass http://sweetvioletmae.blogspot.com/ |
| prariehawk |
Posted - Feb 08 2011 : 8:27:48 PM
Claudia--thank you so much for the tapestry imagery. I embroider, and sometimes, when I look at the back side, it doesn't look like much. But when you see it from the front, it all makes sense. Maybe in this life, all we really get to see is the back, but someday in the hereafter, we'll see it from the front.
Julia--I think that my friend and all the farmgirls on this forum help make the world a better place. I try, but often feel like I'm failing. Again, someday when we see the whole picture, it'll make sense.
Cindy
"Vast floods can't quench love, no matter what love did/ Rivers can't drown love, no matter where love's hid"--Sinead Connor
"In many ways, you don't just live in the country, it lives inside you"--Ellen Eilers
Visit my blog at http://www.farmerinthebelle.blogspot.com/ |
| paradiseplantation |
Posted - Feb 08 2011 : 04:57:47 AM
Cindy, my heart goes out to you. It's people like you, though, that allows her heart to go on living. What a special friend you are to her. This world could use more people like you and her!
from the hearts of paradise... |
| buffypuff |
Posted - Feb 07 2011 : 6:32:58 PM
Cindy, I have hesitated to post as I had nothing really more to offer than what you already know and what has been shared by our farm sisters.I think many of us have been blessed in knowing that bright shooting star that comes into our life, who is brilliant to see and be around and whom we will never forget. What a gift. I have no knowledge why these bad things happen except as you say...there is good and bad together. I as a Christian feel that we all have choices how to act and many act badly. When going through a terrible personal trial, a friend gave me a little laminated card that spoke about a tapestry. We as a child may only see the bottom, a mess of strings, some tied together, others hanging until its completion. It's hard to see what a picture it might portray with the mess on the bottom side. At a later date, God will set us down and let us see what the completion is. It is a magnificent work, everything woven with precision, and making the bright colors stand out are the dark blues and black that outline the beauty, that fill in the scenes and give it a depth that no other color could do. I am sorry that you are seeing the black colors being used now. I hope that in the afterlife you may see your friend again, hug her and give her again the love you have had for her in this past. She weeps no more. My prayers for your pain.
Buffypuff/ Claudia ~ Farmgirl & Sister #870 ~
"It compliments God to ask great things of Him." ~ St. Theresa of Avila
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| prariehawk |
Posted - Feb 07 2011 : 5:51:37 PM
I feel doubly blessed right now--blessed from having known such a good person and blessed by the thoughts and prayers of farmgirl sisters. This world keeps spinning faster towards an uncertain future and it's so important to know that we have each other to rely on. Maybe we can reverse the current flow of events and leave a world worth living in for our children, their children, etc. One thing I know--the change has to come from women--wives, mothers, sisters, aunts--because we, like the Earth herself, are the nurturers of life. Call me a wacko, or whatever, but this time we're living in is so important for the future. to paraphrase Patti Smith, it's time to wrestle the world from fools. Sandy wrestled with fools, using gentle humor, diplomacy, and tenacity. As for those who are mindlessly violent, I don't know what to think. Just that wherever there's good, there's usually evil. I know goodness will triumph in the end, but sometimes it gets awfully obscured and hard to see.
cindy
"Vast floods can't quench love, no matter what love did/ Rivers can't drown love, no matter where love's hid"--Sinead Connor
"In many ways, you don't just live in the country, it lives inside you"--Ellen Eilers
Visit my blog at http://www.farmerinthebelle.blogspot.com/ |
| lisalisa |
Posted - Feb 07 2011 : 09:35:40 AM
Cindy, I'm sorry for your loss and I wish you peace (someday). Pain like that is just too much to bear. Someone who put so much goodness into the world...
I'll keep you in my prayers. God Bless -- L |
| buzzn bee |
Posted - Feb 07 2011 : 05:18:17 AM
My heart weeps for you. I also have lost a friend to extreme violence.
How sad, that your friend reached out to help this person, and he did this to her. Makes one wonder when will all the violence stop!!!
Keep her memory alive by sharing all of her goodness with others. It sounds as though she really loved people. You were lucky to encounter someone so endearing in this journey of life. I would say, she too, was very lucky to have you in her life.
Forever memories of her will rest safely in your heart. Im sure this wonderful lady had to know that she was loved by so many.
Take care friend, and know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.
God Bless.
Deborah
Buzzn Bee
Farmgirl Sister #1185 |
| just4karyn |
Posted - Feb 06 2011 : 10:19:57 PM
I am so very sorry to hear of you friends death I don't understand the world we live in anymore people just don't care about anything or anyone. I personally think the killer of your friend should get the dealth penalty..no trial no I'm sorry I did it BS just off with his head. I know it won't bring your friend back but at least some justice will be served. May you find some peace. Karyn |
| prariehawk |
Posted - Feb 06 2011 : 10:11:01 PM
Thank you, Alee, she was a wonderful person. She liked to tell the story of how I rescued the owl...and she always laughed when people told the story of how she had once "decorated" the tables with some pretty fall foliage--which turned out to be poison ivy! She always recognized it after that!
Nini--thank you for your kind words. There are some people with the prairie who are going to plant some trees near its border when the weather gets warmer. There will be a sign with her name on it. And yes, the memories I have are happy ones.
Cindy
"Vast floods can't quench love, no matter what love did/ Rivers can't drown love, no matter where love's hid"--Sinead Connor
"In many ways, you don't just live in the country, it lives inside you"--Ellen Eilers
Visit my blog at http://www.farmerinthebelle.blogspot.com/ |
| Ninibini |
Posted - Feb 06 2011 : 9:04:53 PM
That was a beautiful tribute, Cindy. I'm so sad that you have lost someone so dear to you - and in such a horrible way. I truly do know how much that hurts. What wonderful memories you have of her, though! I can see she truly was an inspiration, truly loved life and loved her family and friends. I think memories like that are such a gift - part of our loved ones that stay with us forever. How blessed you truly are to have known and been loved by such a wonderful lady! I think it's so great, too, that you are going to carry on her legacy of volunteer work and love of nature. God bless your heart. I pray in time you will find peace about all of this and that all these wonderful things she has brought to your life will bring you great comfort and joy. Hugs - Nini
God gave us two hands... one to help ourselves, and one to help others!
Farmgirl Sister #1974 |
| Alee |
Posted - Feb 06 2011 : 9:03:58 PM
Cindy-
That is so sad that your friend died and in such horrible circumstances. She sounds like she was a wonderful woman. I think it is great that you keep her memory alive in such a wonderful way. *Hugs*
Alee
Farmgirl Sister #8
www.farmgirlalee.blogspot.com
www.allergyjourneys.blogspot.com
Put your pin on the farmgirl map! www.farmgirlmap.blogspot.com |
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