| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| paradiseplantation |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 06:10:41 AM
Am I the only one who just wants Christmas to be over???? I am trying really hard to be a happy farm girl, but I am failing miserably! To others, I am patient; kind; thoughtful; helpful; that's just my nature, and I figure it can't hurt in this otherwise hurried and busy season. But here it is, two days before Christmas, and I'm STILL not finished with my gifts (I'm making handwoven items for several family members); my baking isn't done, my shopping isn't done; I have an extra Christmas dinner to prepare for a friend who's having knee surgery on the 23rd (and who's family is coming from out of town); and..... and ....... and........ Oh! I know I'm just overwhelmed, but I really do feel like Ms. Scrooge. Just cross y'alls fingers for me that I can actually get all this stuff done! (The only reason I'm on the forum now is because I'm at work and I'm on hold, which means I've got a few minutes to even be here!!!)
On the flip side, I do really, from the bottom of my heart, wish all of y'all a very blessed, abundant and Merry, Merry Christmas!!!!!
from the hearts of paradise... |
| 25 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Kayce |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 4:56:11 PM
Amen! Julia very well said.
Learning to appreciate having a glass..not half full or empty..just thankful for a glass :) |
| CountryBorn |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 2:47:04 PM
Oh sweet Julia, you are so very right. Put so beautifully as always. We love you. Have such a calm and gentle Christmas with all of those you love.Nothing else truly matters.I wish this for Julia and each and every farmgirl.
Merry Christmas,
Mary Jane
There can be no happiness if the things we believe in are different from the things we do. Freya Stark |
| southerncrossgirl |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 1:45:42 PM
Beautifully put!!
Love and Peace to you All!
"A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes"==Cinderella |
| mellaisbella |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 1:06:33 PM
on a serious note, I do totally agree with Julia....blessings to you all
"we must be the change we wish to see in the world"
farmgal #150 |
| mellaisbella |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 1:05:33 PM
have a big 'ol mug of egg nog with a splash of rum....that might help LOL!!!
"we must be the change we wish to see in the world"
farmgal #150 |
| Sheep Mom 2 |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 12:35:49 PM
Well said Julia and I couldn't agree more. A very happy, light hearted, joyful Christmas to you and your family and to all.
Blessings, Sheri
"Work is Love made visible" -Kahlil Gibran |
| weaverchic |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 12:27:16 PM
Amen to such beautiful words!
Peace, Love and Joy to you and your family....
Gerri
Happiness is in the comfortable companionship of friends.
-Pam Brown |
| julia hayes |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 10:01:53 AM
Ladies, Ladies, Ladies.....everyone take a deep-deep breath.
I've been off the forum for a while. I was just emailing 4Hmom (kelly) about what's been happening. I'll be writing more about it in another post soon.
Let me say, don't worry. Aria is well and so are we.
I hear you all. I hear the stress, the pressure, the burden that swirls around this Holiday funneling itself out onto the platter of a single day. May I remind you that every single bit of it is contrived. I think we all know this on some level but we allow it to tempt us, to control us and to consume us.
I give each of you permission to do nothing! I give each of you permission to not participate in any other way than the one that suits your spirit, your fancy, your creativity, and your pocketbook. I give each of you permission to NOT feel bad that you're not in the mood. If those in your circle complain about your lack; your lack of involvement, your lack of enthusiasm, your lack of spending, your lack of cheer and so forth, I give you permission to give them my email and they can write to me and complain. I promise to set them straight!
Who do I think I am to give permission in the first place? No one. I just give myself permission to do so.
May I humbly remind you that Christmas as we know it is a figment of corporate imagination. They entice us to buy their things and pair them with generosity, giving, love and happiness. If we don't buy for own loved ones, then we don't love our loved ones..right? That's sort of the hidden message. Isn't it? If we don't knock ourselves out like our friends have done, or our neighbors or family then we are lame, weak, and insignificant. Right? Isn't that the feeling that creeps in and causes so much angst?
Heck I feel it and it takes a great deal of effort to put all that crap right where it belongs...out in the compost pile of my spirit!
What about the commercialism spilling over onto the birth of Jesus, for many a Lord and Savior..shrouding him like some "made in China" baby doll blanket? Many are so disheartened that the birth of this great man has been reduced to buying his plastic lit up image placed on the frozen ground outside our warm cozy homes. They're fun and cute but somehow the majesty, mystery and promise of his birth has faded.
All of this is make believe. We have to remember that Christmas in terms of Jesus' birth on December 25th was arbitrarily assigned. We don't actually know his birthdate, although most scholars believe it was in the Spring. It was assigned on this day as a way to rid the medieval world of the Pagan celebration called, Yule, which was nothing more than a celebration of light and warmth. The yule log (tree) was cut and brought inside..sometimes decorated and sometimes not...always celebrated to acknowledge that the days would soon be getting longer making the cold dark days of winter give way to the light and promise of the coming spring.
Christmas in terms of Santa is only a few hundred years old...and it was resurrected as a way to bring back frivolity during the winter season. People thought it would be fun to decorate, exchange tokens and create traditions. Santa has seen many many different forms over the years...
In the 21st century we are just going over-board....frankly, this is par for the course.
Let me say that this year I am struggling a little. I don't have the reserves to "give" the way I'd like. To 'give" the way others have given to me. I think of so many of YOU who have given to me and to Aria and to my family over the course of these last 2 years and I WISH I had it in me to do something..anything...Alas, I do not.
I could easily become a nice whip and start lashing myself again with all kinds of horrid judgment but, pray tell me, what would this yield? It certainly wouldn't give me the spirit to give and it certainly would do nothing for my general sense of self.
So, may I encourage each of you to put aside your judgments of yourselves...you can cast away how you are not measuring up..you don't have enough money to give..you are going to be late on gift giving..your presents don't look like they were professionally wrapped like those on Martha Stewart, your food isn't going to look pretty, your hand-made gifts are going to appear dodgy compared to those made in china neatly displayed at a nice discounted price at Wal-Mart..so on and so forth.
I may be completely off-base here but may I remind you that giving can only come from YOU..your spirit..your sense of joy...enjoyment....love....beauty...truth. You can not give any of those things if you are stressed and pressure to measure up against standards that someone else created.
We know this. We talk about it. We complain about it. We get our feelings hurt over it. Many a Christmas day is ruined because the measuring up standard is not met. What a complete waste. What a travesty.
So, very simply stated in my ultra-long winded way..
I have a little friend, who died the other day from the same kind of leukemia that Aria has. He was 8 years old. He won't have Christmas with his family this year and they will not have Christmas either. .
We know this happens to "other people." But just sit still for a moment. Just be still. Imagine, for a moment, this is your last Christmas...how would spend it? Imagine this is your last moment with your child...no more Christmas's after that....tell me, does the pressure of what you think you NEED to do and get done matter anymore? Do lights and decorations and bow and paper really matter? Really?
If this isn't your year to do much, then so be it. If you're strapped for cash, then so be it.
I know it is cliche to say that the gift of yourself is enough, but let me tell you, for the last 2 years I have seen that played out again and again and again. I've witnessed more kids dying from cancer than I ever dreamed possible and I know for certain that there isn't a person left behind who wouldn't trade all the gifts they received over the course of their life-time to get their kid back and celebrate one more moment with them.
With that in mind....please try to find a way to celebrate this holiday..this crazy ridiculous made-up holiday by giving your whole heart. You can only do this by being honest and present. You can only do that by finding peace. You can only have that if you recognize how fragile life is and how each moment of each day is in itself a gift. You can only find the truth of that if you are still.
May you all, each of you, find stillness, peace, beauty, joy and love in all of your moments within each of your days. May you have a wonderful, happy holiday that happens not only on the 25th but leading up to it and spilling over after it.
My blessings, my thanks, my peace and my deepest gratitude and regard to you! ~julia
being simple to simply be
Farmgirl #30
www.julia42.etsy.com
www.about-aria.blogspot.com |
| acairnsmom |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 09:06:31 AM
Oh ladies! I just love you all so much! You feel the exact way I feel! I have done NO baking, have minimal decorations up. Only had to to buy 2 family gifts and those were done via internet and shipped off with no worry. DH and I aren't even exchanging gifts (we're waiting for the post Christmas sales). It'll just be DH & I, so why bother? Yet, I'm feeling rather sad that it's not a proper Christmas. We've had plenty of Christmases where we were TOLD we would buy the niece XYZ and at an outrageous price when neither of us were working...And I know she doesn't even remember that we gave her XYZ...Family can be so irritating and then to put Christmas in the mix. It's a wonder any of us are left with our sanity!
To all you fellow Mrs. Scrooges-Hang in there, it's almost over!
Audrey
Toto, we're not in Kansas any more! |
| Sue Feely |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 07:42:35 AM
Julie - I am right with you girl! You are not at all alone. I have just a few little things to do yet, nothing much but the biggest thing is that we have run out of money; we have cut down all of out gift costs by 2/3 to only $50 per each of our four children (all in their 20's) and they are very undrstanding. I am disabled and not working now so no pay for me. I certainly can see why they say that the Holidays can bew depressing.
On the other hand, you girls help to keep me sane! Love to all and have safe travels this season!
Sue Feely
Sister #349 |
| kristin sherrill |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 05:10:21 AM
Julie, the past several years I have wanted this all to just come and go quick. I think it's menopuase. I didn't even want to do the tree or anything. If not for the grands I would have the little tree on top of the tv like alot of grandmothers do. The grands have done all the decorating. But this year I don't know what hit me. I feel like the old Kris again. Weird. But I have done most of the decorating and have been baking up a storm. I even had all the gifts wrapped AND under the tree the beginning of last week. I have never done that before. It feels great to not have that to think about at the last minute. I always did it on Christmas Eve. Never again! I think all I have to do is a pumpkin pie and a pecan pie and a few more cookies. I have Kansas for 2 weeks and she's a great helper when it comes to cooking.
Merry Christmas, and I hope you have a greta time anyway. All of you. And it's good to see Sheila. I was going to put an APB out on her. I haven't seen her in awhile.
Kris
Happiness is simple. |
| tribalcime |
Posted - Dec 23 2009 : 02:53:55 AM
I now how you all feel.. I have been off work for months with no unemployment ..finally found 2 small PT jobs last week that still wont be 20 hrs week with both of them..Kinda takes the happy off enjoying the holidays . But i dont spend bunch $$ annyway at xmas. I only do handmade gifts the last 5 or 6 years and give. I am like deerdawn...they dont like it..their loss ! I did learn to make soap this fall so most people got soap and jewlery this year . That and i made fudge for everyone.
http://www.tribalhorse.blogspot.com ..... http://www.tribalbarter.blogspot.com ( items for sale here ) |
| Sarahpauline |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 4:51:06 PM
You know what, I started to feel anxious in september about christmas. Honestly, this year I just said, I cant do it. I dont want to do it. I respectfully told all my family that we cannot keep up with the joneses this year and we will be spending much less, and would like to have a handmade gift or card or a photograph in lieu of gifts and we will be giving the same. I am not traveling to the ends of the earth to visit everyone, I am staying at home with my son. Thats not bah-humbug thats me enjoying my holiday and if I dont do it, nobody is gonna do it for me. At some point you have to set boundaries. I dont deserve to have to stay up all night, no cookie exchanges, no christmas cards to people I havent talked to in years, just to those who are really close to us. THats it. Its about setting boundaries and saying no sometimes.
Not all those who wander are lost...
www.SarahPauline.com
www.AbraxasBaroque.com |
| deeredawn |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 3:23:59 PM
I refuse to give in to it. The $ amount. I flat out refuse. I give homemade or handmade and if they don't like it, it's their loss. I put my heart into what I've made and yes, it's a little on the cheap side, yes, I'm not the best craftswoman, but, I feel peace in my heart knowing that i've done my best at selecting something special for someone else. Girls, you all have such wonderful gifts in your hearts. Keep the spirit of the holidays in you and the rest will fall into place!
Dawn #279
MJ's Heirloom Maven
http://www.harvestthymefarm.vpweb.com
www.onefunkyfarmgirl.blogspot.com
~I'd rather be on my farm than Emperor of the World~George Washington |
| peachy |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 3:19:13 PM
Hugs to you Julie:) I'm right there with the rest of you...I usually love the holidays but this year is just doing me in big time!
Wishing all farmgirls a wonderful, blessed Christmas and Happy New Year! Hang in there everyone!!! Now...back to wrapping and baking!
Melissa
Farmgirl Sister #360
http://oldethymecountry.secure2cart.com/
http://oldethymecountrybarn.blogspot.com/
Life isn't about waiting for the storms to pass...it's about learning to dance in the rain! |
| AmethystRose |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 1:13:50 PM
No, you're not the only one. Every year I am more resolved to ignore the yearly propaganda of Chri$tma$. I've had it with people who want to yell Scrooge because someone doesn't meet their expectations. After all, Mrs. Cratchit did all the work that Dickens invented.
We have a tank full of heating oil, the bills are paid for this month, a little bit of extra food including some rare treats. If the weather permits, we are going to the Chinese restaurant for dinner, a la ""A Christmas Story". We'll probably have a small bonfire. Breakfast will be something nice, with a little Bailey's Irish Cream in the coffee.
That's peace on my little corner of the earth. |
| Diane B Carter |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 12:08:41 PM
My Christmas gift to my friends was homemade bread & peach jam...Their gift to me (except a few) was no gift exchange!!! I love it!!! It's hard enough to buy for my DH's 3 kids & their familys, my 2 sons & their other half, and my mom it just costs to much, so when my friends said our gift to each other is not to gift at all. I loved it. One had a nice Christmas party everyone brought a dish to pass but no one felt funny about not giving or recieving a gift. It's a priceless gift and a great idea.
Hope all your days are Sunnydays.
dianebcarterhotmailcom.blogspot.com |
| emsmommy5 |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 11:28:46 AM
I love your quote.... Learning to appreciate having a glass... not half full or empty, just thankful for a glass.
The Scrooge mentality has overtaken my whole family. There have been many very tragic events happen in our little world the last month and a half that we are all drained. I am hoping we can focus on each other and having some fun together with some of the activities we have planned, rather than worrying about the gifts, or lack thereof, under the tree.
I am right there with ya'll. But this too shall pass... and it will be a new day, a new year and a chance to foster a new attitude and outlook on life.
Do what you love, love what you do. |
| Kayce |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 11:20:23 AM
LOL, my above post...I guess I was lecturing myself or trying to give myself a pep talk. My transmision just went out on my van.  i wont get that back till after Christmas but that is also money I didnt have. So Im stressed. OMGosh I still have to get my soon to be step daughter Christmas. I had to wait to the next paycheck so I could finish up shopping and stocking stuffers. I know the expectation my mom puts on me to get her,dad, sisters, bro in laws something but it just isnt gonna happen.  So I will print out my above response, keep it in my pocket and referr to it several times .. LOL let the scrooges unite. Power to the Scrooges. hehe Those that are Scroogie against what Christmas has become, I mean.
Learning to appreciate having a glass..not half full or empty..just thankful for a glass :) |
| Kayce |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 11:09:19 AM
What a sad sad thing Christmas has become. Over stressed, over stretched, over worried and on and on. It has become difficult, yes, to not get that way with the expectations that society, our kids, our family and even ourselves put on us. It is hard to say the least to go backwards in a sense. With all the grandor of Christmas today it is hard to go back to simpler times when little ones just appreciate nuts and fruits in stocking and gifts from the heart.
I know this is hard, again to say the least, cause we spoiled our kids. I compensated for a deficit. (dad was always at work) Divorced, still compensating for a deficit. I gave to my children because I love them and love fills my heart for them. But now, Im in the same boat as most. Wanting to give them everything they want but only my heart can afford. So I am gonna start teaching them(not by reading stories but by living it) what Christmas IS not what society has made Christmas become.
Good luck to all you farmgirl friends. Those that are stressing etc take a deep breath and apply the k.i.s.s. method 
{{squeeze}}
Kayce
Learning to appreciate having a glass..not half full or empty..just thankful for a glass :) |
| paradiseplantation |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 10:56:10 AM
Jonni, I'll trade checkbooks with you -- I got paid today, and after all the essentials are covered, I'll have around $13 left. I am so tired of this! Sheri, I'm with you -- a new grandchild is the perfect gift. Every year I tell myself I'm going to get an early start, but it never happens. But at least I know I'm in good company -- so Merry Christmas all you other Ms. Scrooge's!!!! Let's just hang in there -- after all, in four days this will all be over with.
from the hearts of paradise... |
| Sheep Mom 2 |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 10:27:37 AM
I know what you mean - just about everyone I've talked to lately can't wait for the whole thing to be over. It doesn't feel like Christmas this year for some reason - it just feels so forced. It's all become so mercenary - what with "black friday" et all. I am really financially challenged this year and I told everyone that I wasn't doing gifts this year. I worked on my son's wedding all year and then played catch up on my own chores (mainly processing all my raw wool while the weather was still decent) and truthfully, I am tired. I have been giving all year long. Other than the goodies and Christmas dinner, I am just rolling it all down to just decorating the tree. I think it's time we get a grip. Our 6th grandchild was born this morning - he weighed in at 7.4 lbs and is healthy and mom is fine. That's all the Christmas present I need. Merry Christmas.....just count what matters.
Blessings, Sheri
"Work is Love made visible" -Kahlil Gibran |
| pinkroses |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 10:10:46 AM
No you are not alone
I have never like this
it is so over comericalized
I am sick of the whole thing
I celebrate the birth of my Savior
but
I don't even put up a Christmas tree any
more.
I can't wait for it to be over
I have never liked the holidays
Sorry to be such a Hum bug. hugs sheila
www.ohkayteagirl2.blogspot.com
http;//www.sheilascreativewritings.blogspot.com |
| FebruaryViolet |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 07:39:56 AM
You know what, Julie? I feel exactly the same way. And it stinks, because I should be very excited for my little one's first Christmas. I can barely keep my eyes open, we have $40.00 to our name and STILL gifts to buy, and my husband decided (this morning) that he's not coming to my office Christmas party this evening because he "loathes" them...truth be told, I wasn't exactly looking forward to it because I need to clean my bathroom (Vi hasn't been feeling well and with everything else going on, things have gotten neglected) but it's always a nice time, and my company is very generous. Especially when other places have all but cut out their holiday festivities.
I'm also really frustrated with the amount of $$$ that has been emphasized (in our family) with giftgiving this year. We do a gift exchange with the adults, and then buy for the kids. My nieces and nephews all want items that cost $40 and up. My husband is out of work, and we are barely making it...add on $50.00 ($25.00 a piece for the adult exchange) and you've got a lot of money going out the door. I want to give to people...I love to give to people, but this year I feel "commanded" to by "a" or "b" and I feel cornered--we were given "lists". But, yet, noone asked me what I wanted (with the exception of my mom and dh)...It would be different if we had it, but we don't. And, how can you disappoint kids?
I think, too, I've been feeling pretty lousy (physically) myself, but I don't have the time nor the money to go to a doctor. Rather keep the heat on!!
So, I hear ya. I think next year, we're going away for the holiday :) Nova Scotia sounds nice!
Musings from our family in the Bluegrass http://sweetvioletmae.blogspot.com/ |
| ddmashayekhi |
Posted - Dec 22 2009 : 07:39:02 AM
Stop! Count your blessings, then take a deep breath and finish what truly has to be done. Should you have any energy left & want to do the extras after that, then go for it. Otherwise, just smile, say Merry Christmas and don't list all the things that didn't get done! Celebrate all you have now!
Dawn in IL |
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