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 The 3:30 in the morning realization...

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T O P I C    R E V I E W
catscharm74 Posted - Jul 25 2009 : 01:40:49 AM
Yep, just woke up out of a dead sleep...kinda freaked me out...I had a huge aha moment...this one is big..I realized that nagging part of me that has been pestering me LOUDLY over the past 2-3 years is the fact that since I was 17 years old, I have been on the run. Not in a bad way but I have never lived somewhere more than 3 years since then. Believe me, I have enjoyed my life and ALL the things, people, opportunities, etc...but I realized I spent half my life moving and never settling or finding that true bliss. I have it with my little family but a gal can only go so long with a social network that she calls home and friends. I am happy with the people I have met but no one stays around or we move so dang much, I am tired of starting over, telling the same reason why, the same stories and fighting to find my niche, only to have it torn up and changed yet again. I am tired of trying to figure out if my curtains will fit at the next house, spending money to fix the one we rent, blindly moving into a place and HOPING it works for us. I am ready to settle, find my bliss, find my HOME and stay for some time. It hit me like a ton of bricks tonight or rather this morning.

Heather

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catscharm74 Posted - Jul 25 2009 : 10:54:00 AM
We are really working hard to make this goal come true...I am NOT staying in the military lifestyle any longer than we have too, I just won't survive it. I have had enough. I don't care if we have to sell everything we own and start fresh to make it happen, I WILL make it happen for us. Thanks for the understanding comments. I just feel alone alot.

Heather

Aunt Jenny Posted - Jul 25 2009 : 10:44:06 AM
I totally understand. I am 50 years old and have lived in no less than 40 houses. We moved alot when I was a kid too..until 6th grade, when we stayed in one place until I graduated. I got married one month after graduation from High school to a guy who had an extra "moving chip" so holy cow..we moved alot more. Then I was single and moved a few more times..married and moved twice more...we have lived in this house for 7 years now and it is the very longest I have lived in ANY place in my entire life. I hope we never ever move. I really hate moving. This place, although it isn't the 10 acre farm of my dreams, is home. It is enough. I love this old 105 year old place, with all it's silly old problems and all. I hope you find your perfect place sometime soon.

Jenny in Utah
Proud Farmgirl sister #24
Inside me there is a skinny woman crying to get out...but I can usually shut her up with cookies
http://www.auntjennysworld.blogspot.com/ visit my little online shop at www.auntjenny.etsy.com
1badmamawolf Posted - Jul 25 2009 : 09:13:16 AM
I could'nt even imagine moving around like that. I have lived 2 places, my parents in Missouri, and my late husbands and my home here in California. The move from M to C almost killed me, a completly differant world, I absolutly HATED it here in C, All i wanted to do was move back to M. Then it finally hit me, this big peice of dirt was ours, just ours and nobody elses, thats when I fell in love, and have been here for 36 years. You too will find your slice of the pie, and you'll know it when that feeling of peace and love just about melts you on the spot. Also thanks for your services.

"Treat the earth well, it was not given to you by your parents, it was loaned to you by your children"
catscharm74 Posted - Jul 25 2009 : 07:01:07 AM
Yes...military...and thank you for your thank you and thank you both for your service...

We are so done with the active duty. It just has not been fun that past 3 years, Scott is thinking of doing the reserves, so we have the home base WE want, not what is dictated. We could get settled, keep friends, get Charlie going, ya know. And, yes, I admit, with my career, I can't get ahead like I would want and Scott totally supports that. He understands that I have put my career on hold for 4 years and he knows how much I love my work. He also wants to volunteer more and start coaching football again. It would just be easier if we were settled.

I used to be very let's go and live but I think age, kiddo, life has changed that for me.

Heather

Cabinprincess Posted - Jul 25 2009 : 06:42:35 AM
Hi Heather, are you in the military?? You sound like my husband and I when we were younger. Both in the Air Force and always moving. I always felt the same way about the boys being plucked up again. But now in a different stage of life and knowing the hind site. The boys really don't even remember the places we lived or things they missed before the age of 8. Just not part of their memory banks. What they do remember were family holidays like Christmas or a special place they got to go like Yosemite because of where we were stationed. All the things I fretted about were all in vain. What we are so very thankful for is my husband retired from the service so the long term benefits are priceless. A pay check for the rest of his life, medical coverage for the whole family, BX and commisary shopping forever. For us, roots to the boys were only that they have a home to come back to so they can have a home cooked meal. You will have what you want in time and find you will enjoy it even more because it was not something you take for granted.
Smiles, Melody June
PS If you are in the military, thank you very much. I can sleep at night now, knowing your on watch now.

God's gift to you are your talents, your gift to Him is how you use them.
catscharm74 Posted - Jul 25 2009 : 06:11:32 AM
Yes, Charlie needs roots. If I was single or just the 2 of us, it would make it easier. I do feel bad he makes friends and then leaves. I don't want that anymore. I can enroll him in things but then we leave and he misses them. I also need some peace and stability. Always knowing in the back of that a move in coming is very stressful and I can't relax. Also, we can't buy the things we want, for fear of breaking something or having to move it 300 times.

Heather

peapicker Posted - Jul 25 2009 : 04:48:45 AM
Heather, I hope you get your perfect place to provide you and your family with peace and blissfullness soon. I need to have a settled in life too. It could be the mom thing too thats weighing heavy on you. I always felt like my children needed roots and the secure feeling of their home always being there. I know some people can move and travel often and really enjoy it, I'm just not one of them.
dutchy Posted - Jul 25 2009 : 02:49:58 AM
Heather I can relate to you so much! Mom and I did quite a lot of moving around to at one time. Stayed a year then we moved again. But now I am here to stay, if I have anything to say in it. I love my home, my friends, my church, my area, my neighbors! I WILL STAY PUT!!!!!

Settling down is something we all need in our life.
Hugs to you from me

Hugs from Marian/Dutchy, a farmgirl from the Netherlands :)

My personal blog:
http://just-me-a-dutch-girl.blogspot.com/

Almost daily updates on me and mine :)

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