T O P I C R E V I E W |
melanie47601 |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 04:40:10 AM This was e-mailed to me today. I thought I would pass it on. enjoy.
Dog's Diary OH BOY !!!!!!!
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing! 9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing! 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing! 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing! 12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing! 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing! 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing! 5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing! 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing! 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing! 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
Cat's Diary Day 983 of my captivity...
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now................
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11 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
Nance in France |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 09:41:30 AM Melanie, that is HILARIOUS! Thanks for giving us a good giggle! Hugs, Nance |
katmom |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 07:43:09 AM hahahaha! tooooo funny! >^..^<
>^..^< Happiness is being a katmom. "I've never met a sewing machine I didn't like!"
www.katmom4.blogspot.com
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K-Falls Farmgirl |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 07:42:54 AM Cute, They sure are different!
Cheryl Farmgirl #309
Almost daily posts at: http://www.k-fallsfarmgirl.blogspot.com/ Come visit the barn at http://barndoorcreations.blogspot.com/
Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise', I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
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graciegreeneyes |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 07:37:26 AM That is funny as heck!! although sadly I wish my pets fit that description, they are both sorth of abnormal:D Amy Grace
Farmgirl #224 "use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without" Heirloom Mavens Badge Badger |
Lainey |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 06:50:44 AM lol, I'm going to email that to my husband too.
Farmgirl Sister #25
http://countrygirldreams.blogspot.com/
An Angel says, 'Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn't happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice.' |
Nancy Gartenman |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 05:48:13 AM That is pretty funny!
www.Nancy-Jo.blogspot.com |
Marybeth |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 05:45:35 AM Too funny and yet so true. MB
http://www.smallcityscenes.blogspot.com www.strawberryhillsfarm.blogspot.com www.day4plus.blogspot.com www.holyhouses-day4plus.blogspot.com "Life may not be the party we hoped for...but while we are here we might as well dance!" |
miss wilma |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 05:33:49 AM great pick me up Funny
Farm Girl #96
http://www.picturetrail.com/misswilmasplace
http://misswilma.blogspot.com/ |
jpbluesky |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 05:32:55 AM Wow, that is so true! Which is why I have always been a dog lover.
Farmgirl Sister # 31
www.blueskyjeannie.blogspot.com
Psalm 51: 10-13 |
4forMe |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 05:19:25 AM I emailed that to my husband....it is so funny and so true to the differences between dogs and cats. LOL.
Sewing, knitting, gardening mom of 4. |
Mumof3 |
Posted - Feb 16 2009 : 05:12:06 AM lol
Farmgirl Sister # 18 :)
www.perfectlittlemiracle.blogspot.com
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