| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| catscharm74 |
Posted - May 09 2007 : 8:34:41 PM
I did it!! I finally made an appointment with the physchologist. I just need to talk to someone. I need some "tools" to get past my family issues so I can move with a healthy head to Texas. I've been picking my brain on how to do this and I just decided I need some help. I know I have the right attitude, I just need some more insight and ideas. The problem is I say one thing but my head and heart still think another and I just need to move on. I am just wondering what to expect? I know people think that those who go to the "head" doc are...well...crazy... , but I think it is going to being very healing and helpful. So anyone willing to talk about it (or email me in private), I would appreciate it. |
| 23 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| UrbanChick |
Posted - May 29 2007 : 06:24:43 AM
I've had anxiety issues years ago and actually was housebound for 10 months. I couldn't even step outside to take out the trash. My roomate was very helpful and would take me to my doctors appointments. I could go to those without too much panic but I would have to come straight home. You will be surprised how much stuff you can get delivered when you are housebound. I took medication for a little while but it didn't help. I was "saving" my anti-anxiety drug and tried to overdose. I spend some time in a hospital and after that I was told by my doctor no more pills for me. So we started on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. It took me about a year to get it so I didn't need to go to regular sessions with him. I control my stress and depression now and I have been medication free for over 10 years. It gets hard sometimes but I don't have the big waves of ups and downs like I did. Anyway, I hope all goes well with you and therapy. We all need a little help when times get tough and have someone to talk to about it.
"Courage dosen't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying: I will try again tomorrow." |
| TheSoapMaven |
Posted - May 29 2007 : 06:10:07 AM
Oh and by the way...I take Welbutrin every day - yes, it is an anti depressant. I dont want to know if I can "get off of it". It does little more than keep me from having waves of anxiety and blues. It doesnt solve anything or stop anything from happening. I am not proud that I have a chemical imbalance in my brain but I am also not ashamed of it. My mother is the only one of my family that never took meds for depression/anxiety and she might have benefited the most, bless her heart. I think she always thought she would be admitting weakness to take meds. That is not true at all. My dear sweet husband has never needed such things but he completely understands my needing them. And reminds me to take it - he can tell within hours if I have forgotten.
We have had a couple of kids that saw a doctor for some anxiety issues. Again not ashamed of this but they are old enough to tell their own stories so I won't. Never a psychologist but our family dr who is one heck of a counselor! Sometimes an outsider looking in is the most helpful.
Enough already! I don't want to ramble...just want to encourage you! Again, bless you and yours.
Susan
http://www.thesoapmaven.com
http://notquitejunecleaver.com
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| TheSoapMaven |
Posted - May 29 2007 : 05:58:38 AM
I need a "thumbs up" smilie! Look, whatever you need, is what you need! That's profound huh? You know what I mean. No one should judge you for making decisions for helping yourself. I always joked that I would scare the bejeezes out of a therapist! It was kinda joke and kinda not. We ALL have issues. Some BIG ones. There are a few people that know most of what goes on inside my head and they still love me!
I am very guilty of not reading all the posts before I post and there are things on here I miss so I don't know what has been going on with you but I do hope you will find resolution soon.
I hope you find comfort in your being able to talk to someone who has no vested interest and can be completely honest and helpful. People who know and love us cannot do that no matter how hard they try.
So realizing my opinion means absolutely nothing...I still think you are doing a very wise and difficult thing. Many blessings!
Susan
http://www.thesoapmaven.com
http://notquitejunecleaver.com
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| Patsy |
Posted - May 29 2007 : 05:43:39 AM
I see a psychologist every two weeks and I attend a women's group every Wednesday. It is the best thing I ever did. I went thru some very tough times in the last few years and I didn't realize that it had affected me the way it had. Just find a therapist you can trust and that works for you.
May God bless those who love the soil,
Patsy
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| sewgirlie |
Posted - May 28 2007 : 7:56:54 PM
I would still go today if I could justify the weekly expense!! It changed my life in the best ways...it did not change my past or even some of my current circumstances, but it helped me understand them and have strategies for handling the "stuff" that was keeping my total happiness at bay. Just remember never hold back. If you don't tell everything, you will never be able to heal. Sometimes it hurts to go there, but it will ease eventually once you lay it all out there and look at it honestly.
Good luck! It was worth it! |
| nashbabe |
Posted - May 28 2007 : 08:47:19 AM
People don't tell asthmatics that if they just tried harder, they could breathe, and that they don't need any help.
People don't tell diabetics that if they just concentrated and thought right, their pancreas would work right.
Yet we as a society say that a lot about emotional or psychological issues.
Take the help when you feel it is needed. It can be a physical issue just like anything else. Therapy, counseling, meds, whatever is appropriate is a good idea. Searching for a good person is probably the toughest part.
Hubs and I went right after we were married--not because of our own issues, but because of my psychotic mother and her tirades. She is probably BPD or bipolar. We're going to look for whatever help is appropriate again now because of the same issue combined with all the "fake son" care, his mentally unstable mother, and all the stress we're dealing with. We just want an outside perspective on things and maybe some wisdom or ideas we can't see as clearly because of the intense stress.
I do think that meds are often too quickly prescribed especially in the case of rambunctious kids, but for every kid in that situation there is probably another kid who desperately needs meds. I certainly know one who needs them and wants help but his mom won't get him the help he deserves.
At the same time my dad, who was depressed a lot, was part of the "a pill should take care of everything" group and he really should have sought counseling as well.
Grew up on a farm...moved to da city...grew up a farmgirl! |
| BotanicalBath |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 12:26:29 PM
No you are not crazy... and it take greater strength to seek help. So dont let anyone tell you that you are crazy for seeing a shrink.
I saw one while I was going through my divorce. It was a lot to deal with and it helped that I had someone to talk to.
And I didnt kill him.
E-
BotanicalBath@peoplepc.com
www.Botanical-Bath.com |
| Vintage Redhead |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 12:12:22 PM
You've made a *great* choice and you won't be sorry you've done this for yourself.
I am personally nuttier than an almond tree. I've been seeing a psychiatrist for 11 years. My motto is: People who admit they're crazy are *normal*...it's the people who *think* they're normal and not crazy that you need to worry about!
Think of it this way: going to psychologists / psychiatrists is nothing more than any other type of specialist. If your arm was broken in three places, would you ignore it or would you go to a
bone specialist? Well, after years of your family abusing your brain and fragile psyche, you have said *ENOUGH*!! and are seeking treatment from the right specialist. And we all have a fragile psyche - we should all have our own "head" doctor and we should all feel compelled to speak as openly about it as we do our trips to the gyno or the dentist.
You'll never be sorry for not doing this. My only regret at 28 was that I suffered for *at least* 15 years. Either nobody ever recognized the signs of my depression or saw them and never bothered to tell *me.* It took me almost stealing my own life away from myself to understand what was happening... To think that I could have missed having such wonderful children because this is such a socially taboo topic.
~ Kaylyn ~ (Living in Suburbia with a FARMGIRL Heart!)
My Cause: http://nickspavilion.blogspot.com/
My Life: http://vintageredhead.blogspot.com |
| JudyBlueEyes |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 11:55:16 AM
Catscharm, I think you have made an excellent choice! I have been to therapy and found it very helpful. The fact that it is YOUR decision and you have some clearcut goals will be very helpful to the counselor and to you. It seems with your positive attitude you will soon be able to reconcile your heart with your head and move on with strength and renewed purpose. And good advice from those who have said, be sure you click with the counselor and don't be afraid to change if you see the sessions going in a way that doesn't feel right to you. Good luck! Judy
The Rooster crows, but the Hen lays the egg. ~ Texas Proverb |
| catscharm74 |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 11:12:49 AM
"The only down side is when you've had the lightbulb turned on over your head a few times, and gotten a taste of the insight and peace it brings, you'll wonder just why the heck you waited so long to go!"
I think this is where I am at now...amazing what happens!!
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| Utahfarmgirl |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 10:56:10 AM
So what's wrong with being crazy? I find it quite a lot of fun!
Farmgirl hug,
Patricia
Farmgirls do it organically! |
| horse |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 07:24:38 AM
I went to one when I was still married the first time. After several sessions, he told me I wasn't the one who needed to be there but my x, who was my husband at the time. I knew that I needed to leave him but I felt quilt about tearing my kids lifes up. I knew at that time I needed a divorce and did it. Why I waited so long, who knows. After the divorce, I went back. I found out that I liked who I was and I could stand on my own two feet. It was the best thing for me to see the Doc. I wish you the best. Don't get dishearted after a couple of visits for it will take awhile. You yourself will find the answers, the doc, is just there to pull it out of you. Hang in there and God bless.
Laura
www.2lmzfarms.blogspot.com |
| Horseyrider |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 07:05:51 AM
Yes, and I have several shrinky types in my family. The course of current treatments have moved away from lengthy sessions involving how you got along with your mother, and more to ways to cope with what's on your plate right now. Not to say that some time won't be spent on past relationships, but the bulk of your time will be spent on gaining skills, tools, and finding solutions that work for you.
You will be SO GLAD you did this. It's very empowering!
As to what to expect, the first session will be mostly getting your history. The shrink (catch-all name for the clinical psychologist, psychotherapist, and psychiatrist) will ask a lot of questions and won't get deep yet. They may ascertain if you'd be helped by medications like antidepressants along with talk therapy. In the sessions to follow, they'll ask you questions about current dealings with family and other things going on in your life, and help shed light on how previous relationships and interactions affect your feelings and choices now. I'm telling you, when that light goes on over your head, it's so bright and warm you can hardly believe you missed this all along!
Good therapy is truly life changing. I have also had one that was clearly not taking me where I needed to go. I felt like she was only half listening and forming opinions without really knowing what was going on. When that was clear, I discontinued and found someone else.
I'm very happy for you, and admire your proactive approach. The only down side is when you've had the lightbulb turned on over your head a few times, and gotten a taste of the insight and peace it brings, you'll wonder just why the heck you waited so long to go! |
| KYgurlsrbest |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 06:57:07 AM
Oh. I have something else...it sounds weird, but often, I've judged a doctor by his staff--meaning, who you speak to when making appointments, how courteous, how accomodating, etc...In the mental health field, I find that the staff seem to be somewhat emotionally distant (I guess you'd have to be) and really aren't all that friendly....this was with most offices that I contacted, and getting an appointment is almost impossible (at least in this area). I felt like I was going have a nervous breakdown over my bills and the uproar of my life, and the receptionist said, "Do you have suicidal tendencies? No? Well, your appointment is set for 4 weeks from now."
I eventually ended up at a private practice, with one physician out of his home. He was older and he answered his own phone and had evening hours. He immediately put me at ease.
"In the spring, at the end of the day, you should smell like dirt." Margaret Atwood
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| mima |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 06:55:25 AM
Therapy helped me alot,I think you and I have similar family issues. But it did take trying a few therapists until I found one that I felt comfortable with. Good luck and good for you! |
| westernhorse51 |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 06:47:55 AM
I agree with some of the girls saying find the right fit & I am not sure how you do that. I havent been but my husband has in the past & it helped him. My other advice is, pray, pray you find the right person. I hope Im not making you angry by saying that but it works for me. Good luck with it.
she selects wool and flax and works with eager hands Prov.31:13 |
| KYgurlsrbest |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 06:43:00 AM
Sure. I especially needed some counselling after my divorce. It was a tough time financially, and I was either crying or angry, or having an anxiety attack in the office--not myself at all. I found it helpful to have an "outside" source--my mom, bless her, tried to "fix" everything, and my friends really kind of kept my "anger" going by being on my side so much, and my doctor just listened, offered insight and often, I found the solution myself. Good for you for taking care of yourself.
I second Diane's suggestion about finding the right "fit" for you. Just because they have a certificate doesn't mean that they're necessarily a good doctor!
"In the spring, at the end of the day, you should smell like dirt." Margaret Atwood
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| ktknits |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 06:40:16 AM
I agree that it's good to go, but also use your own "farmgirl wisdom" and don't just believe everything they tell you.
DH & I had some problems some years ago and went to a counselor. We went separately so he got to hear from both of us. About the third time I went in to see him, he told me that I might just have to get used to the idea of divorce. That nothing lasts forever. That DH had some major problems with my having a college degree and him not having gone to college (not that he couldn't, he just didn't want to), with my working full time and having a good job (DH was unemployed), and with my being involved in outside things (like knitting & weaving guilds), and that I basically had gone on with my life and left DH in the dust, so I needed to face the fact that divorce was the answer. WAIT JUST A MINUTE!! This isn't really why I wanted us to go to counseling, and this was the last time I went to see him. DH never went back either. We both prayed and worked very, very, hard at making our marriage better and we both made changes in what we do with our time and how we spend it together, and thank the Lord, we've gone on much happier together for the last four years.
So, while counseling can be good, don't swallow it hook, line & sinker (I typed stinker - HA!)
My prayers are with you too! Kathy
http://ktknits.blogspot.com |
| mommom |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 05:13:22 AM
I applaud your decision to seek help. You go girl! My prayers and thoughts are with you. Susan |
| westernhorse51 |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 05:06:59 AM
one more thing, don't let people put "labels" on you for doing something good for yourself. If anyone says it's "crazy" to do this, give them the number, they need more then you.
she selects wool and flax and works with eager hands Prov.31:13 |
| westernhorse51 |
Posted - May 10 2007 : 05:04:36 AM
I think it's crazy NOT to go when you feel you should!  We all need help to get past things in this life. The help is the tool you need to move on. Good for you!
she selects wool and flax and works with eager hands Prov.31:13 |
| DaisyFarm |
Posted - May 09 2007 : 10:45:23 PM
I have and it was the best thing I ever did. Turns out I wasn't going crazy after all! I started having horrid anxiety attacks and agoraphobia (for five years) after my last daughter was born.
Don't be set on the first doc you see being a perfect "fit" for you and don't hesitate to see someone else. The first one I saw needed a psych. himself...he was a freak! Second one was just great...helped me to see the lighter side of it all and I was well on my way to recovery in no time.
I did find that they have a tendency to make you answer your own questions...sometimes pushing a little more than you will find comfortable. But they do lead you in a healthy direction through it all.
It's a step that I don't think you will ever regret and I totally agree with Ricki in that it is a very healthy thing to do. I so wish our society would lose the stigma associated with it.
You can ask me anything here or email me if you like.
Diane |
| simpler1773 |
Posted - May 09 2007 : 8:42:55 PM
I sure don't think anyone is crazy for going! I've never been, but probly should have! I give anyone full credit for going because I think it's an extremely HEALTHY thing to do for yourself. Good job!
~Ricki~
You can't pour anything out of an empty vessel, take care of yourself! |
