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Project Discussions:  Input Needed ... What Would You Have Done ...  |
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kysheeplady
True Blue Farmgirl
168 Posts
Teri
KY
USA
168 Posts |
 Posted - Aug 15 2013 : 5:43:56 PM
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Hi girls,
I had something happen to me, that has bothered me for the past few days ...
It happened with a farm girl from the "dark side".
This person, I can't really use the farm girl term (now) has been on MJF for a very long time. I am not going to say her name or write it. But I will tell you what happened. And ask your opinion as to what you would have done ...
Anyway, this person e mailed me via MJF over 2 maybe 3 months ago and cried on my shoulder about how the people on MJF did not understand her and how she does not feel a kinship with them, and how mean they are and how she is not going to go on any more. You know the poor me's ... And would I like to be pen pals with her? We emailed a few times and my response was that I felt that some of the girls were mean and looking for fights and had to chime in and that I myself was drawing back from it. I did not feel happy or welcome on the other side ... I felt as though someone was always looking to one up or cut me off or up ... And so I agreed to be pen pals with her at her request. BTW, she never one time wrote to me.
As time goes by, I log on to MJF to check on barters, swaps (with hen house girls) and to list some things for my barter. Well, I had noticed this person was back on MJF .. and not just an occasional post but, back with a vengeance ... post 3 or 4 post a day. I actually answered one ... and got no response.
Anyway, I pm her and said EXACT quote " I see you are back with a vengeance, I sure hope it works out for you this time" Good luck.
I then in turn get a nasty email from here ... blasting me ... about she did not have to answer to anyone about posting and so on ... and that I was attacking her ... and what did I mean by VENGEANCE.
So I give her the definition of the word To an extreme degree ...
And then I say, you being a writer should know the meaning of the word ... and then I get blasted again ... with excuse and stories ... and so on ...
So my e mail to her was We're done now ...
So girls what would you have done?????
Teri
"There are black sheep in every flock"
White Sheep Farm
www.whitesheepfarm.com |
Edited by - kysheeplady on Aug 15 2013 5:50:26 PM |
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tammyc
True Blue Farmgirl
481 Posts
Tammy
Danville
California
USA
481 Posts |
Posted - Aug 15 2013 : 5:51:44 PM
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Teri, I probably wouldn't have been as nice as you!!! Hilarious that she didn't know the meaning of the word vengeance...LOL!!! I have said it before and I will say it again....with VERY FEW exceptions I am strictly staying with our henhouse girls. So many women on the "dark side" are petty, small minded and ignorant. Not all of them, but enough to make me back away.
Now I would block her email address so she cannot contact you! What a lunatic!
Big Hugs from your California friend who will always have your back!
Tammy
"Be who you are and say what you like because the people who mind don't matter and the people who matter don't mind" - Dr. Seuss |
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Killarney
True Blue Farmgirl
2115 Posts
Connie
Arlington
TN
USA
2115 Posts |
Posted - Aug 15 2013 : 7:17:12 PM
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Terri, I think you handled it well as you could considering how she reacted! I agree with everything Tammy just said! HUGS!!! Connie
Imagine....#3392 |
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darlenelovesart
True Blue Farmgirl
6194 Posts
darlene
Loleta
California
USA
6194 Posts |
Posted - Aug 15 2013 : 7:24:18 PM
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Terri
Yes I think you handled it well too!
hugs
darlene
Farmgirl # 4943
Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.
Tell God what you need, and thank him for what he has done.
Philippians 4:6
Just follow God unquestioningly.
Because you love Him so, for if you trust His judgment there is nothing you need to know.
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treelady
True Blue Farmgirl
1305 Posts
Julie
medina
ND
USA
1305 Posts |
Posted - Aug 15 2013 : 7:57:04 PM
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Terri,
I think you handled it very well. We are all here for each other and I for one love that fact!
Hugs
Julie
A little rain can straighten a flower stem. A little love can change a life.
Max Lucado |
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levisgrammy
Scattered Prairie Hen Honcho
10938 Posts
Denise
Ohio
USA
10938 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2013 : 06:42:06 AM
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Ouch! Sorry you had to deal with that Teri. I know when I was blasted with an email about my question and topic that got locked...don't know if you remember that or not but when I emailed and asked this person not to email me again I noticed she has not been posting on the forum. I feel really bad and though I am sure it had everything to do with her stopping her posting I hope it did not.
I think we can not always know what a person really wants, thinks or means through emails sometimes. I just started posting more on there after that whole incident even though I was quite disheartened but I figured she was only one person that made me feel bad and I wasn't going to let it ruin things for me and all the girls there who are friendly and all.
I think you handled it all well. I am sorry you even had to deal with such a thing.
hugs,
Denise~~
Farmgirl sister#43
"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path"
Psalm 119:105
www.ladybugloveslilacs.blogspot.com
www.torisgram.etsy.com |
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levisgrammy
Scattered Prairie Hen Honcho
10938 Posts
Denise
Ohio
USA
10938 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2013 : 06:46:19 AM
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One thing I noticed too about my particular incident is the person who emailed me to "correct" me had only joined the forum a month before that. :/
hugs,
Denise~~
Farmgirl sister#43
"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path"
Psalm 119:105
www.ladybugloveslilacs.blogspot.com
www.torisgram.etsy.com |
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Blessed in Colorado
True Blue Farmgirl
5769 Posts
Debbie Fischer
Coos Bay
OR
5769 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2013 : 1:48:13 PM
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Teri you handled it as a farmgirl should and how I believe we all would have handled it. Like Tammy said I think I would block her emails so she can not harass you any more. Sadly I have a list, that seems to grow weekly, of farmgirls who do not act as they should and are just plain mean to me as well as others and I will not have any dealings with them through swaps, barters etc. And when I do wish to participate in swaps and any of the farmgirls who are on my list sign up I kindly ask the hostess not to partner me with that particular farmgirl. To be fair I do give them at least 3 chances to make amends or right the wrong against me or any of my farmgirl friends and sisters, it is about respect to me and caring about your other farmgirl sisters. I could not and would not intentionally hurt a farmgirl for any reason at all, each of them (y'all) are special to me and I do not want to lose the friendships I have with each of them I treasure them all.
So, there is now another farmgirl added to my "naughty" list as you don't mess with my Chicks:-)
Love You,
Debbie
Proud Mama Hen of SPG
"There is nothing better than to end a bad day covered in dog slobber!"
www.etsy.com/shop/CollectThisTreasures
http://debbielynnf.blogspot.com
http://myworld.ebay.com/debbt |
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levisgrammy
Scattered Prairie Hen Honcho
10938 Posts
Denise
Ohio
USA
10938 Posts |
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levisgrammy
Scattered Prairie Hen Honcho
10938 Posts
Denise
Ohio
USA
10938 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2013 : 4:19:08 PM
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I don't understand why there is the need by people to be mean. I don't know if it's me or maybe I just don't "really" know a lot of the girls but I have only had this one incident happen to me in the 6 years I have been on the forum. Everyone else has been fine. I had a barter problem and it took "FOREVER" for the person to send me her part of the barter but she did finally and it didn't ruin anything. I guess I made it a point of trying to understand from her point of view but that was a totally different situation and neither of us were harsh to the other.
Things like this really saddened me. I am so glad for this hen house and all of you here. I feel blessed to be part of one where we are all close and can say "I've got your back". 
hugs,
Denise~~
Farmgirl sister#43
"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path"
Psalm 119:105
www.ladybugloveslilacs.blogspot.com
www.torisgram.etsy.com |
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Sue Feely
True Blue Farmgirl
243 Posts
Sue
Buffalo
New York
USA
243 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2013 : 5:07:12 PM
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| Whew, I am almost at a loss for words; did you ever the term :mean people suck"?. I remember one time in my household years back someone had been nasty to me for no reason at all. The next day before they all came home from work or school I posted several signs around the house that said Mean People Suck! Most of the household had their mouths open cause thats not like me to say something like that, Im usually a punching bag but it really hurt me and the signs made me feel so much better, score one for the mom! |
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darlenelovesart
True Blue Farmgirl
6194 Posts
darlene
Loleta
California
USA
6194 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2013 : 5:11:28 PM
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It is sad that people feel they need to be mean and that only makes it worse because then they become very lonely. They need prayer.
hugs
darlene
Farmgirl # 4943
Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.
Tell God what you need, and thank him for what he has done.
Philippians 4:6
Just follow God unquestioningly.
Because you love Him so, for if you trust His judgment there is nothing you need to know.
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sweettea59
True Blue Farmgirl
1371 Posts
Sherry
Longview
Texas
USA
1371 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2013 : 5:41:20 PM
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Oh Teri, some people, I don't know why people feel they have to be mean. You did right, you are too busy doing good to be brought down by someone like that. She just needs to get a life. We are here for you always. Hugs all around everyone
Farmgirl Hugs & May all your Wishes come true.
Sherry
Farmgirl #2215
www.etsy.com/shop/markiebuck |
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Killarney
True Blue Farmgirl
2115 Posts
Connie
Arlington
TN
USA
2115 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2013 : 5:51:07 PM
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Thank you Mama!! and nobody is gonna mistreat our Mama Hen either!!! When a person just insist on insulting and hurting people's feelings, even after they have been called out about it, then there's not much you can do, but block them ,say a prayer for them. I was on a swap during the summer, and the swap hostess was so mean right there in black and white on the forum hurting a brand new Farm girl's feelings, It was her first swap. I could not believe my own eyes... what I was reading, So I emailed the new girl in private, told her don't judge her first swap by this experience and gave her the names of wonderful Farm Girls I know and trust, she thanked me and said she would try again. I know how she felt, It happen to me my first month on MJF.
Imagine....#3392 |
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darlenelovesart
True Blue Farmgirl
6194 Posts
darlene
Loleta
California
USA
6194 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2013 : 6:10:27 PM
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Oh that is a sad story. It was good you were there to help her out Connie.
hugs
Farmgirl # 4943
Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.
Tell God what you need, and thank him for what he has done.
Philippians 4:6
Just follow God unquestioningly.
Because you love Him so, for if you trust His judgment there is nothing you need to know.
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Killarney
True Blue Farmgirl
2115 Posts
Connie
Arlington
TN
USA
2115 Posts |
Posted - Aug 16 2013 : 6:30:17 PM
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Darlene, it was and I forgot to say most all of you in the Hen House was names I gave her to watch for ,and the girls I have met here that I did not know back then, I think the same of you also! HUGS!
Imagine....#3392 |
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kysheeplady
True Blue Farmgirl
168 Posts
Teri
KY
USA
168 Posts |
Posted - Aug 17 2013 : 04:43:51 AM
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Thank you all so much! This is why I love this side of MJF ... this is how I think the other side must have started ... but, sadly failed.
Connie, the smae thing happened to me on MJF I wanted to join in on a swap (jean pocket) last year. I did not know anything about the pocket or what they did with it.
So I em the hostess and she was just down right rude and optuse that it made me sick. She said I could look up the link of the last pocket swap and look at those photos. End of story. No help, no nothing! She still is a swap hostess and has a huge following. But this is one farm girl who will never join in one of her swaps. I think she didn't want someone new, thinking that maybe their (my) work might not be up to HER standards! If she only knew!
Teri
"There are black sheep in every flock"
White Sheep Farm
www.whitesheepfarm.com |
Edited by - kysheeplady on Aug 17 2013 05:27:54 AM |
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levisgrammy
Scattered Prairie Hen Honcho
10938 Posts
Denise
Ohio
USA
10938 Posts |
Posted - Aug 17 2013 : 07:51:52 AM
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Oh Teri that is so sad that a hostess would treat others that way. I decided to host the RAOK which I know can also be a big disappointment for people when their things are not acknowledged but I figured I'd give it a shot this one time. Sometimes I think there should be a list so we know who not to deal with but then I think people need to be forgiven and a second chance. Then of course I do wonder if I have disappointed people myself and I would not want to see my name on that list. :/
hugs,
Denise~~
Farmgirl sister#43
"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path"
Psalm 119:105
www.ladybugloveslilacs.blogspot.com
www.torisgram.etsy.com |
Edited by - levisgrammy on Aug 17 2013 11:12:06 AM |
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levisgrammy
Scattered Prairie Hen Honcho
10938 Posts
Denise
Ohio
USA
10938 Posts |
Posted - Aug 17 2013 : 11:16:36 AM
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Sad isn't it to find that the place you thought was safe to do swaps and be involved in has taken such a turn. It' is just not what it used to be that is all.
Debbie, I am so glad that we can come here and still be involved in those things.I really love it in this hen house and I'm so glad you invited me in! 
hugs,
Denise~~
Farmgirl sister#43
"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path"
Psalm 119:105
www.ladybugloveslilacs.blogspot.com
www.torisgram.etsy.com |
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kysheeplady
True Blue Farmgirl
168 Posts
Teri
KY
USA
168 Posts |
Posted - Aug 17 2013 : 5:40:47 PM
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Ditto that Denise! It just feels safer here.
Teri
"There are black sheep in every flock"
White Sheep Farm
www.whitesheepfarm.com |
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LadyInRed
True Blue Farmgirl
296 Posts
PeggyAnn
Vancouver
WA
USA
296 Posts |
Posted - Aug 19 2013 : 12:24:31 AM
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Girls...isn't it Lovely To Have a Group that REALLY SUPPORTS EACH OTHER?
I found my Happy SPOT right here in this Hen House...with ALL MY FAVORITE FARM SISTERS!
Love and Hugs,
Peggy
Farmgirl #1326
http://ladyinredsite.blogspot.com
"Leave Your Cares Behind...Join Us On The Porch"
"I'm only as strong as the caffeine I drink, the hair-spray I use and the Girlfriends that I have."
When I was a lonely wallflower, Jesus asked me to dance. Then he asked me to be His! |
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darlenelovesart
True Blue Farmgirl
6194 Posts
darlene
Loleta
California
USA
6194 Posts |
Posted - Aug 20 2013 : 12:00:59 AM
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This is not the kind of thing Mary Jane would want on the farm either.
Farmgirl # 4943
Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.
Tell God what you need, and thank him for what he has done.
Philippians 4:6
Just follow God unquestioningly.
Because you love Him so, for if you trust His judgment there is nothing you need to know.
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kysheeplady
True Blue Farmgirl
168 Posts
Teri
KY
USA
168 Posts |
Posted - Aug 20 2013 : 07:36:57 AM
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But ... nobody who can do something, trys to stop it, which is VERY sad. MOST girls that are on the MJF are ture farm girls, but sadly like apples, it only takes a few to spoil it for others. Leaving the other feeling, hurt, sad and disappointed in their fellow farm gilrs ... So so sad ...
Teri
"There are black sheep in every flock"
White Sheep Farm
www.whitesheepfarm.com |
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levisgrammy
Scattered Prairie Hen Honcho
10938 Posts
Denise
Ohio
USA
10938 Posts |
Posted - Aug 22 2013 : 06:58:09 AM
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I have been wondering is there anything that someone who has the authority could do? I know there's has been talk about having a list, but the forum is so big that I am not sure what anyone could do. Fortunately for me, the swap I am in now I am partners with a chickie in our very own hen house! :) That was just good fortune for me this time.
hugs,
Denise~~
Farmgirl sister#43
"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path"
Psalm 119:105
www.ladybugloveslilacs.blogspot.com
www.torisgram.etsy.com |
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Blessed in Colorado
True Blue Farmgirl
5769 Posts
Debbie Fischer
Coos Bay
OR
5769 Posts |
Posted - Aug 22 2013 : 07:10:12 AM
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I do not believe there will ever be a list on the forum for many reasons, but we each can have our own lists, I do, I call it my 'nasty list". And when I do a swap on the forum if someone has joined the swap from my list I contact the hostess and ask her not to partner me with that particular farmgirl and why. The hostess is usually kind enough not to partner me with the particular person. I also know that there are many other farmgirls who have the same request to the hostesses.
So, I am not sure if this would help you or not Denise.
Hugs,
Debbie
Proud Mama Hen of SPG
"LIFE IS 10% WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU AND 90% WHAT YOU DO WITH WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU." ~ANONYMOUS"
www.etsy.com/shop/CollectThisTreasures
http://debbielynnf.blogspot.com
http://myworld.ebay.com/debbt |
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levisgrammy
Scattered Prairie Hen Honcho
10938 Posts
Denise
Ohio
USA
10938 Posts |
Posted - Aug 22 2013 : 07:40:28 AM
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I only have one person who I had a problem with Debbie and I think I posted earlier that she finally followed through but it was close to a year before that happened. She is no longer on the forum.
I was just addressing Teri's comment about the ones who maybe could do something.
Having a list of our own is, I'm sure, the best way to go.
hugs,
Denise~~
Farmgirl sister#43
"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path"
Psalm 119:105
www.ladybugloveslilacs.blogspot.com
www.torisgram.etsy.com |
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Project Discussions: Input Needed ... What Would You Have Done ... |
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Input Needed ... What Would You Have Done ...
