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Family Matters:  When you know somethings wrong....prayers  |
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celebrate2727
True Blue Farmgirl
989 Posts
Beth
MJF
Farmgirl
989 Posts |
 Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 1:22:52 PM
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I am not sure how to begin this thread but I am going to just jump in I guess. Since the fall of 2005 my son(now 16) has attended a school in the city as he is a very gifted football player. It is a private school with alot of wealthy children attending. We, however are farm people(yipee) and life is very different up here. We have put lots of pressure on Brandon to succeed both on the football field and in school. We had started to notice that his grades had dropped a bit, he had less patience with his younger brothers and would just be up in his room on his computer when he was home. He just wasn't our Brandon anymore. So as his grades to a dive recently my husband and I came down harshly on him. Why was this happening? Something was wrong I could feel it. I involved his teachers and his head football coach. What was going on? Well, after a particularly bad science test score about two weeks ago I really let him have it. Grounding him, dishes every night, no lap top etc. Later he came quietly in my room and sat on my bed. I put my arms around him and asked what was going on. Please tell me, you can tell me anything. He started to cry and talk. Hard to get the words out he spoke slowly. Inside I just knew he was going to tell me he was on drugs. I held my breath as he finally told me. He had found a lump in his testicle at the beginning of school in 2005 and it had been growing and is now the size of a golf ball. He was sure that it was cancer and that he was going to die. My husbands cousin died of this when he was 17.
What can I say. I held him so tight that night and assured him that even if it is that we will get through it. Inside, I felt horrible. All this time and he never said anything. All my yelling and screaming and this is what it was. What kind of mother am I?
Tomorrow we go in for a biopsy and then from there we'll see. Our family is going through a very scary time right now but I wanted to share this with you gals because you need to talk to your sons. this is such an embarassing thing for them to talk about but it has to be talked about. This hits men from the ages of 15-40 on average and can be serious if not detected early.
Well tomorrow we find out what road we will have to travel. I ask that you keep my son in your prayers.
blessings
beth |
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Tina Michelle
True Blue Farmgirl
6948 Posts
Tina
sunshine state
FL
USA
6948 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 1:27:15 PM
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oh Beth..I will be remembering you and your son.I really hope that all will be well.
~Seize the Day! Live, Love, Laugh~ |
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Leezard
True Blue Farmgirl
950 Posts
Elizabeth
Novi
MI
USA
950 Posts |
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blueroses
True Blue Farmgirl
1323 Posts
Debbie
in the Pandhandle of
Idaho
USA
1323 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 1:47:04 PM
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Beth,
I'm so sorry, honey. The poor kid and you all too. Don't feel too guilty. At least he has finally come to you with his fears and I will be praying for you all. He must be so scared but I know you will all be there for him. Hugs to you.
"You cannot find peace...by avoiding life."
Virginia Woolfe |
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Mumof3
True Blue Farmgirl
3890 Posts
Karin
Ellenwood
GA
USA
3890 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 2:03:22 PM
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Oh Beth. I am so sorry. It's odd the things our children keep bottled up. At least now you know and take care of things. I am sure that he is just so frightened by what this could mean. You are both in my prayers.
Karin |
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_Rebecca_
True Blue Farmgirl
568 Posts
Rebecca
OK
USA
568 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 2:08:01 PM
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Bless his heart. My goodness. I will pray for your family.
.·:*¨¨* :·.Rebecca.·:*¨¨* :·. |
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Libbie
Farmgirl Connection Cultivator
3579 Posts
Anne E.
Elsinore
Utah
USA
3579 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 2:12:52 PM
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Oh, Beth. I'm sending prayers and love to you, your son and your whole family. Please don't be harsh on yourself - we are ALL learning, and we ALL do the best we can, at any given moment, with what we know combined with our experience and beliefs. You are a GREAT mother, and he's one GREAT son - I just know it. Keep hugging each other ---
XOXO, Libbie
"Nothing is worth more than this day." - Goethe |
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Naturecraft
True Blue Farmgirl
82 Posts
Cheryl
Loveland
CO
USA
82 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 2:28:28 PM
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Beth, you and your son will be in my thoughts. It's hard being a mom so don't be hard on yourself. We do the best we can! Just be thankful that he finally told you.
BB,
Cheryl |
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Luzy
True Blue Farmgirl
922 Posts
Luanne
Pueblo
Colorado
USA
922 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 2:31:18 PM
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Beth, you are in my thoughts and prayers. Thank goodness he finally told you and now you can take action. Please don't beat yourself up. You're obviously a good Mom and you're fortunate to have each other, as he seems like a great kid also. Hang tight, we are all here for you. Keep us posted. Big giant hugs, Lu
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May I always be the kind of person my dog thinks I am. |
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Aunt George
True Blue Farmgirl
1476 Posts
Georgann
Midlothian
VA
1476 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 3:30:45 PM
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Beth, We are there with you in spirit and prayer. My heart feels like it just dropped off of a shelf after reading your post. (((((((((((((((((((hug)))))))))))))))))))))) Don't beat yourself up, hug your boy, be kind to yourself. Take each day as it comes.
My son had growth there, and it was a hydrocele. With your son doing so much football, perhaps it was a pinched testicle or he got kicked there or the protector is irritating it or a hernia....until tomorrow!
http://auntgeorgeshouse.blogspot.com/index.html
Thanks for checking out my apron and sewing musings! |
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Kim
True Blue Farmgirl
146 Posts
Kim
Pflugerville
Texas
USA
146 Posts |
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katiedid
True Blue Farmgirl
601 Posts
Kate
West Jordan
Utah
USA
601 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 3:45:35 PM
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I am sending you the "white light" that dear Patricia (UtahFarmgirl) is always talking about..it is the healing light of God, and Love.
I am praying for you
Kate
my new blog http/www.theknifemakerswife.wordpress.com |
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EnchantedWoodsGirl
True Blue Farmgirl
959 Posts
Kathy
New Jersey
USA
959 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 4:00:07 PM
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Beth I am sorry for you and your son and you are both in my thoughts and prayers. As Aunt George said, perhaps it is just an injury. I am sure your son knows how much you love him - it must have been very scary for him to find and have to talk about. Hugs to the both of you. If you need anything - ask - I am always here.
Kathy of the Enchanted Wood
http://enchantedwoodmusings.blogspot.com/
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Hideaway Farmgirl
True Blue Farmgirl
1553 Posts
Jo
Virginia
USA
1553 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 4:27:32 PM
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Beth, I will add my prayers to you and your son...this poor scared boy, having all those fears and not wanting to admit it. Hopefully, this will turn out to be a small issue such as an injury ,,,our best friend's teenage son went through a similar situation, with a clear biopsy and just a small scar to show for it. But, oh, those scary days of waiting. I feel for you. Hope your son knows how many farmgirls are sending hugs and prayers up in his name and yours...please keep us updated on his situation.
You can't beat yourself up about this, either...you were always being a parent and keeping his best interests at heart; and in the end, he did come to you for help.
Jo
"There are no strangers here, only friends you've yet to meet." |
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Aunt Jenny
True Blue Farmgirl
11381 Posts
Jenny
middle of
Utah
USA
11381 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 4:30:18 PM
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You all will sure be in my prayers daily. I sure wasn't expecting you to say what you did about what he said. What a shock that had to be for you! And don't beat yourself up..you had no way of knowing. I am so glad he told you now. I wish there was more we can do...shower him with love!!
Jenny in Utah
Inside me there is a skinny woman crying to get out...but I can usually shut her up with cookies
http://www.auntjennysworld.blogspot.com/ visit my little online shop at www.auntjenny.etsy.com |
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jpbluesky
True Blue Farmgirl
6066 Posts
Jeannie
Florida
USA
6066 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 4:46:32 PM
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Beth - thank God he did finally tell you and that you were there to hug him. He will always remember that!!!! And it will be okay. Prayers to you.
Jeannie
Ephesians 1:17 |
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happymama58
True Blue Farmgirl
1210 Posts
Patti
Missouri
USA
1210 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 5:15:51 PM
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Beth, first of all, I've put Brandon (and you & dh) on my prayer list.
Secondly, and VERY IMPORTANT, the fact that Brandon didn't share this with you and you didn't know about it has no bearing on what kind of mother you are!! He is a kid, and he reacted like even some adults do (I've heard of women finding lumps and ignoring them for months!). You could not be expected to read his mind or somehow figure out what was troubling him. Especially since this is such an unusual situation. You and your husband have handled this the way any caring, involved parents would do. Period!! Stop second-guessing yourself (easy for me to say). Ask yourself what you would have said to another farmgirl if she told you this happened to her -- I bet you would have assured her (rightfully so) that she has no reason to feel guilty. Treat yourself the same way, okay?
I promise you that I will pray for Brandon throughout the day tomorrow. Hang in there!
Some people search for happiness; others create it.
Please visit me at www.marykay.com/pmiinch |
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EmmJay
True Blue Farmgirl
352 Posts
Mary Jane
Amherst
Nova Scotia
Canada
352 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 5:51:21 PM
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Oh Beth, Patti said it so very right. What would you have said to someone else. I am sure that you are a WONDERFUL Mom.
My prayers for you, your son and all your family are headed up.
Please keep us posted, as I am surely not the only one in tears. Hopefully good news to follow.
MJ
"Thank GOD I'm a country girl"
http://s119.photobucket.com/albums/o134/EmmJay07/ |
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shelle
True Blue Farmgirl
404 Posts
Shelle
oklahoma
USA
404 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 8:07:24 PM
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(((Beth and DS)))
Bless your hearts!! I hope that everything goes well and I am sending prayers up to heaven for your DS and your whole family. Please let us know what you find out from the biopsy. Dont be to hard on yourself about this. I can tell you are a great mother. I am just so glad that he was finally able to come to you to tell you what was going on.
Thinking of you and your family
Shelle
http://janzenfamilyjournal.blogspot.com/ |
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bramble
True Blue Farmgirl
2044 Posts
2044 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 8:53:09 PM
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Beth- Adding my prayers for all of you. Sometimes kids keep the strangest most unexpected things to themselves for reasons they can't even begin to understand. Don't beat yourself up over what you thought was something else. Spend your time, love and energy on getting this evaluated and dealt with. There is no blame, just time to take action. Hugs to all of you and prayers for a bill of good health. Remember you are not alone.
with a happy heart |
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jo Thompson
True Blue Farmgirl
603 Posts
Jo
the mountainside of the Chugach
in Alaska
USA
603 Posts |
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cinnamongirl
True Blue Farmgirl
1682 Posts
Carrie
Canada
1682 Posts |
Posted - Mar 06 2007 : 11:46:57 PM
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| The burden that poor boy carried around and tried to sort for himself! You should be so proud to be who you are as a loving parent to know your son so well and be able to receive an answer. That is true love ,embrace, and may the angels help you through hope it was caught soon enough!! Let us know |
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LizDarnell
True Blue Farmgirl
102 Posts
Liz
Gulfport
MS
USA
102 Posts |
Posted - Mar 07 2007 : 05:18:27 AM
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Beth I have and will continue to pray for your son and you and the whole family. My good thoughts and hopeful prayers are with you and yours.
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Aunt Karen
Farmgirl in Training
33 Posts
West Central Idaho
USA
33 Posts |
Posted - Mar 07 2007 : 05:31:34 AM
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Beth, you and yours are in my thoughts and prayers.
My first husband had this problem when I was pregnant with our son. After surgery and treatment I am happy to tell you he is alive and well over 25 years later.
Please keep us posted.
Karen |
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westernhorse51
True Blue Farmgirl
1681 Posts
michele
farmingdale
n.j.
USA
1681 Posts |
Posted - Mar 07 2007 : 05:46:33 AM
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oh Beth, you & your family are in our prayers & thoughts of course. I am so glad he told you & please don't be so hard on yourself, you didnt know. Let us know how he is.
she selects wool and flax and works with eager hands Prov.31:13 |
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Nance in France
True Blue Farmgirl
1438 Posts
Nancy
St. Laurent de la Salanque
France
1438 Posts |
Posted - Mar 07 2007 : 07:57:36 AM
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| Beth, I just saw this thread. I am praying for you both; let us know as soon as you do. Nance |
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Family Matters: When you know somethings wrong....prayers |
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When you know somethings wrong....prayers
